Once a broken soul in time,
The thought of living in cold clime,
Yet slowly - the harsh mountains I climb,
As I found Bifrost - Truly Sublime!

I imagined what lied beyond,
Would I be bestowed upon me - a Monde?
Or perhaps with the Aesir I would bond?
Who knows - Mayhap even Asgard's Lamond!

Yet still - I mightily hesitate,
Could I cross Bifrost in such a mortal state?
My thoughts are all I could sate,
With delusional illusions I forcefully create.

What if I cross it to my own demise -
Only to be tricked eternally by Loki's cunning guise,
Or face Nidhoggr's malefic sting?
Mayhap not even Bifrost to cross - with Heimdall's deadly swing.

No Plagiarism! Adieu.
As I looked around - left and right,
All I saw was darkness - and the smell of dirt,
Not a single ounce of light -
Not a single sound was heard.

I tried to stretch far - but how could I move?
In such a confined space - of rotten wood,
My body - No longer I need to behoove,
It was then - The moment I understood.

I wrote this on the spot, and somehow, I refuse to continue writing it. This could be one of the most mind-disturbing poem I've ever written, as the writer. Feeling weird just writing it. Phew. Aite.

No Plagiarism! Adieu.
Heyo people. So some people told me that I should in fact, not let my poet soul die off. Some say that I shouldn't let my talents go to waste - so I'm considering to write more poems now. So let's start off...with a poem.

As he gazes up the night sky,
He looks around with keenness,
He wished that somehow - he could fly,
To find his beloved Venus.
With nothing to hold -
He could only hope to see,
That one day - Venus will unfold,
For his heart to be free.
But alas - he waits for all eternity - 
What if Venus stays obscure from sight?
Locked in the chains of infinity,
Never again to see the light.
No matter - Still he waits eagerly,
Till then - he stands alone - Bitterly.

-Firaga-

Whew. 
No Plagiarism! Goodbye people.
So I keep writing poems in such a standard, four lines per stanza - I though I might wanna try something new myself. Although the form may seem a bit weird. I think it came out alright.But that's my opinion. Tis' a nameless poem.


My logic is simple,
Although somewhat ample,
Of what begets people,
Yet days cloud man's mind,
There is no curing the blind,
For man's brain is in his hind!
Why can't man see his folly,
Must I guide him on a trolley?
O - such melancholy.
Worldly lusts destroys,
Men are merely toys -
With scarcity in poise.
I hope for man to one day see,
For the world to be soon free - 
From man's self-made decree.

-Firaga-

No plagiarism! Adieu people.

After such a long time, I have returned.


So I haven't posted anything for nearly four months. Countless events had happened in my life - some of them worth mentioning, while others deserve none of the sort.

Quite recently, I actually snapped. Which basically means that I lost my cool, and that never happened before in the history of my life. I won't actually explain what happened, but one thing worth saying is that that event destroyed possibly three-quarter of the patience that I have. Considering how much of a patient man I am, that would probably mean that I am now a hot-tempered, sensitive, semi-emotional human.

Other than that, is a story of busybodies. I don't even know where to start - I simply don't understand why people can't just stay away from other people's personal affairs especially when one is as "uninvited guest".
Seriously, just handle your own lives and stop bugging others. If you feel offended by this, then good - I'm making a point.

Also I think I realized something. That I am slowly becoming vainer by the day. I guess it is good. I guess its time to stop being a couch potato and start to work harder. If I can train myself to play Dota 2 professionally, then why can't I just do the same for my body, right? I'm not getting any younger, and health could be an annoying issue. And girls like hot guys I guess. Hahaha.

Well.I said countless events but that's just an overstatement. Other than that I guess my life has been a generic, hectic, tiring process of waking up at 6 a.m. everyday and going to class until evening. And there are those posers and fakers - those usual bunch of hypocrites that I don't have to mention. Man but recently seeing some people putting on fake accents and fail miserably at it pisses me off. Can't even pronounce a word properly and you try to put on a Brit accent. That's just sad and low.

Ah well. I guess that's it from me. Will think of a poem to write soon. But not anytime soon. See ya'll. Have a great life and good luck dodging life's poop :)
Aite,so many things had happened recently that I don't know where to start.Well I guess I'll start with my dream 2 nights ago.In my deep slumber,I dreamt of my old,lost love.The lady who I was unable to let go for over a year.It was really random.I don't really remember how it went,but I remember myself giving her a huge,long hug.Maybe,just maybe,I still miss her,huh?Well,who wouldn't?Especially if that person's your first love.Although unrequited, but a sweet dream is a sweet dream.She was still as beautiful as ever in my dreams.


That's one thing.Then the issue with my tooth.Mysteriously,I thought the wisdom tooth problem was settled a few months ago.Yet, it came to haunt me again a few days back.What's funny is I woke up this morning,and the pain was gone.The swelling had gone down too.Now I wonder if it was really a wisdom tooth,or was it just some weird infection.Meh,I wouldn't give a shit if it doesn't hurt.I guess the human mind won this battle,eh scumbag gum/tooth?


On another side note,My gaming clan - or what it used to be, A.K.A. ExTinctz, has gone down the dumps now.No more team games,and some of the key members had given up on this.I myself had stopped playing dota for about 3 months. Then,it happened.A sudden urge to create my own group. So now I have, in fact made my own group,focusing on several games - not just dota, and we are called Etheria Gaming (Abv. EtherG). With my old partner Skaj,I think a new hope will be reborn from this.I will take my dreams of professional gaming somewhere.

Check us out if you're interested:



http://steamcommunity.com/groups/etheriagaming


Although,we are just a small community for now,but I will find more capable allies to envision the dream into a reality.


Yeah,that's the gist of the important things.The rest can just remain unmentioned.Ta-Ta for now,people.
I haven't posted anything for quite some time now. I'd figure it is time to post something here.

Well, the first thing I'm going to "rant" about tonight is about hypocrisy. I wonder why sometimes, that even in the midst of all the open minded people around me, there lies a big ass judgmental, prejudicial shithead lying behind the "open-minded" masquerade they put on so proudly.

Wait, now that I think about it, you could never know which is the facade - the open minded side or the judgmental side. Which even makes these people even bigger hypocrites than hypocrisy smells.
Either way, I don't mind if you're gonna be open-minded - that's good, at least you can see things in several perspectives. On the other hand, if you're gonna be this judgmental person, go look at yourself in the mirror. I reckon you are THAT perfect to judge another. Well, unless you think you're God. But hey isn't that blasphemous towards yourself, since you SHOW that you are such a saint and a holy man? I mean hey, if you're religious enough you should know that you shouldn't play God, right?

So maybe if you are going to judge someone based on the way they dress just because it contradicts what YOU believe in, well, like I said, you are not at all a perfect person who had never committed a sin, no? Or are you going to judge someone on how they act and how they bring themselves in this world? Oh-ho, if you're going to talk about sex all day long and show how "open-minded" you are, I don't think you're in any place to judge anyone, no? Ergo, stop being a bitch talking about religion and what people are supposed to do and what not. You have no right to do so. You are not any better than any other human being. If you are looking for fame by the rest of the people who share your opinion, well - that's even more sinful isn't it? Judging others for the sake of your own fame and happiness. Since ya'll "believe" so much in sin and reward,  maybe you should think about the consequences about condemning others.

Ah well. What can I do other than to re-quote what Franziska Von Karma said;

"Foolish fool spouting foolish foolishness,just as I expect of a foolish fool such as you;
A foolish fool with a foolish sieve for a brain only speak foolishly with foolish words,"

So yeah. I have nothing more to say about hypocrisy and the stupidity surrounding it.
What hurts me is that even some who are close to me are hypocrites as well. When will you all realize the folly that you conduct oh-so freely everyday? Such despicable tomfoolery is too much for me to handle.


Since somebody has asked me to write a poem, as I have not written any for almost half a year, well, here goes.

*Masque*

Thou speak of things which lives in thee,
As it exists deep within thy heart,
O - the irony of that being true -
A truth that lies within thy heart.

Thou only wears a masque,
One that grows with thy face,
To some thou portray class - 
Alas, thou simply speak in a lace.

Hypocrisy is the word -
The living lie that thou stands in,
It is like wielding a sword,
Only to slay thy own Queen.

What can be said - profess thy idiocy ,
As an endless sea of flames,
In the end there shall be no mercy,
For thy prejudicial claims.


-Firaga-


Ah well.Enough ranting for tonight. Time to grab myself a nice meal.
Adieu for now.

I just cancelled my Dota 2 matchmaking because I felt like I needed to write here. Well,I kinda suddenly had a random thought about having somebody with me. Funny that I am not remembering "her" as a person I miss, but more of a "person" I miss. Bah, its complicated. I guess its kinda like when you miss having someone to love,but not exactly missing the one you once loved.

Its kinda sad really.I seem so happy on the outside but inside I'm pretty much a shattered soul.

But then, I kinda remembered there was someone who said something to me on MSN a long time ago - a year or two maybe?

Well,I only remembered that I was somewhat ranting about how broken my family was, and she went like "You shouldn't say that about them,think of all the people in the world who would give anything to have a dad,"

Oh well,I did rant about my dad that time.I guess it never really entered my brain until now.Ngeh, sure, he is somewhat not normal,but a dad's a dad I guess.And family's family.Can't choose em.

I've accepted my family as it is a long time ago. But the issues happening inside me - internal conflicts within myself - this took a huge toll on me that its hard to control myself anymore.The bad tempered "me" is returning - a personality I thought was long gone.

Maybe its because of loneliness.I don't know.Yeah sure, friends will be there as friends, but..I need someone who can understand me, who could be with me (as how that lady did sometime ago)...

I'm not choosing a girl over my family.Its just that I need someone to complete myself, so that I can treat all of them as my family.

But I guess wishes will never come true.My love life has failed since the eon of time, and when hope seems to rise, it carries me so high into the sky and, without me realising it - throws me back to the ground.

Oh well...I guess for now, this is what I have to bear with. The internal conflict within myself may seem bizarre, but alas - the truth.

Well I'm getting sleepy.Its 5.30 AM here.Goodbye people.
So...I know I've been trying to be the funny dude - the class clown, the guy who can show not an ounce of worry in his life. Long enough is when I realized that people just fucking hate the shit out of me.Either that or they just try to act nice.Or they'd find me the annoying bastard who they can't stand.

Well fuck ya'll.I'm tired of being nice.Trying to wear a mask of happiness to cover my old self turns out to be the most worthless thing I've ever done.

Okay then,so this is what all of you want right?You'd wish to see the old me?Okay.I grant your wishes.So yeah.I ain't gonna take no shit from anyone.

Whatever.Sleep time.
Sometimes I end up feeling down when I reminisce on the past and then realize how fucked up it is now compared to last time.

But I kinda realized something now too.There are things in my life now that I could be happy about.Heck, I am happy now.Heh.

But beyond that happiness,I feel a gap somewhere in the middle.The missing link.Which is to have somebody.Somebody special for me to shower my love.Without it,I can't seem to achieve that level of happiness.

What naivety eh?After being heartbroken so many times,I still do search for that love that I need.
Call me gay or whatever.Heh.
There is a person - a fine lady, one who has always been at the back of my mind though.I wonder if...

Well.Haha.I ought to not take things so seriously.But feelings grow, and slowly it is getting harder and harder to contain.But I guess even I can't run away from fear and doubt.After going through so much shit,heck - who could blame me?

But well...I'll see how things go.In time all shall be revealed perhaps.

Adieu people.
Oh well. Apparently a new blog was needed. Its a sign for me that I have moved forward and let the past dwell in the abyss.

....And I seem to be left in awe because of someone.Well,this person is very close to me.Over the years I've always wanted to see changes inside of this person - which I did. But alas this person never did change one bit.Watch how you treat people man.You will lose your friends and family if you keep this up.

...You disappoint me,brother.

Well, no matter.

No poems this time.Too lazy to think of any.
...Maybe 4 lines.

To rise and start anew,
As I awake by the morning dew,
One that is known by few,
The love that I once knew.

Adieu fellas.